One of the Recovery tools that I have learned is to ask myself, “would you do that to someone you love?” If the answer is “no,” my behavior that I am contemplating (or doing) is probably self-destructive.
Couching suicidal ideations into planning a murderer, stealing one’s own happiness as thievery, shaming and hateful self-talk as bullying, and cutting as slicing someone profoundly elevates the self from a lowly object of self-hatred to a human subject of worthy of love and respect.
We. Are. Human. Protected by laws and society. From others, and ideally, from ourselves.
I engaged in all of these self-destructive thoughts and behaviors, save cutting myself, before I got into Recovery. And I have burned myself with cigarettes.
It is thought-provoking to consider that had I done these things to another human being, I would have been jailed or imprisoned. Yet in the throes of my Bipolar Disorder and Addictions, I hated myself so much, and was in so much pain, that it was”OK” to torture and plan to kill myself.
Prayers for all those who haven’t learned to treat themselves with the respect, dignity, grace, and love that human beings need and deserve.
And strength to all of those who can help them, according to our resources and abilities.